The Death of Sarah Livingston Jay: Editorial Note
The Death of Sarah Livingston Jay
The declining health of Sarah Livingston Jay had long been a concern for her husband and children. Sally had suffered from an undiagnosed illness in the years preceding her death, and the letters of family members of this period contain frequent queries and updates regarding her condition.1 She had suffered a particularly virulent attack, possibly a stroke, in early November 1800 that left her with “Her speech being affected, and the use of her right hand and arm being diminished”, and her body exhibiting “some thing of the paralysis kind”.2 Her recovery in the months following this episode remained slow and uneven. In a letter written to Maria Jay Banyer in the weeks before she died, Sally assured her daughter “with the greatest sincerity” that she was on the mend, noting, “my health & appetite increases daily & that I really & truly feel very well indeed.”3 Unfortunately, her health took a turn for the worse shortly thereafter, and she died in her home at Bedford on 28 May at the relatively young age of forty-five. According to William Jay, his father was at her side, “calm and collected,” at the time of her passing. When he perceived that she was gone, he took his children into an adjoining room and read to them from scripture.4
Local newspapers broadcast the event of Sally’s death with obituaries that extolled the many facets of her virtuous character. Such announcements spoke of “the uncommon merits of the woman— the amiableness of the friend—the cheerful, placid temper of the wife— the tenderness of the mother— the elegant accomplishments of the lady— the unaffected piety of the Christian.”5 The missing presence of Sally weighed heavily on her family. Each grieved in their own way. Maria Jay Banyer’s husband reported that she mourned alone and would not leave her room for some time.6 Jay’s deep sorrow was somewhat tempered by his belief in the workings of divine providence, yet he nonetheless acknowledged that the joy of his long-awaited retirement was greatly diminished by his wife’s absence.7
1. See GM, Diaries, 8 Feb. 1800, 2: 69; JJ to SLJ, 6 June 1800, above; JJ to PAJ, 8 Dec. 1800, ALS, NNC (EJ: 11453); 18 Dec. 1800; 21 Mar. 1801, both above; PAJ to JJ, 11 Dec. 1800; 2 Jan.; 21 Feb.; 5 Apr. 1801, all above.
2. JJ to PAJ, 8 Dec. 1800, ALS, NNC (EJ: 11453). For JJ’s description of SLJ’s illness, see PAJ to JJ, 11 Dec. 1800, note 3, above.
4. WJ, 1: 430–31.
5. Obituaries for SLJ appeared in several New York City newspapers, including Evening Post, 29 May 1802; American Citizen, Commercial Advertiser, Daily Advertiser, Mercantile Advertiser, and New-York Gazette, 31 May 1802.
The earliest announcement stated:
DIED
At Bedford yesterday morning, after a short and severe illness, in the 45th year of her age, Mrs. SARAH JAY, the amiable and much respected wife of his Excellency JOHN JAY, the late Governor of this State, and one of the daughters of the late Governor LIVINGSTON, deceased.
The Language of euologium on the dead is too common and too indiscriminate to entitle it always to respect. The writer of this feeble tribute to the memory of departed worth, cannot, however, but indulge the hope that when it meets the eye of living recollection, it will be allowed to be neither feigned nor exaggerated. All who had the happiness of an intimate acquaintance with Mrs. JAY, will hear testimony to the uncommon merits of the woman—the amiableness of the friend—the cheerful, placid temper of the wife— the tenderness of the mother— the elegant accomplishments of the lady— the unaffected piety of the Christian.
“From an admiring world she chose to fly;
With nature there retir’d and nature’s God,
The silent paths of wisdom trod,
And banish’d every passion from her breast,
But those, the gentlest and the best,
Whose holy flames with energy divine
The virtuous heart enliven and improve,
The conjugated and the maternal love.”
Evening Post (New York), 29 May 1802.
7. JJ to RK, 20 Jan. 1803, below.